When you finally give birth to your little one after nine long months, it seems the baby isn’t the only thing you get to take home with you. You’ll also be blessed with suggestions and advice, often unwarranted, from a barrage of friends, family, and complete strangers. Among the helpful hands and nice comments, there are some things that new mums are fed up of hearing by the end of the first week, and uttering any of these around a mother ought to be grounds for banishment for at least a year.
This little gem actually starts well before the baby comes, from those annoying people who tell you to get some sleep before the baby arrives as if you can store your sleep up in some kind of bank. While the idea of sleeping when the baby sleeps is nice, it completely discounts your need to do other things such as eat, socialise, watch TV, do some cleaning, and generally just enjoying solitude without a little baby attached to you.
These are usually from the old school of thought which said that babies need to be bred tough. You might hear that you’re spoiling the baby if you pick them up when they cry, rock them to sleep, cuddle them too long, or do just about anything that’s seen as nurturing and caring.
We love to tell this to all mothers, and while the sentiment is nice, it’s just plain impossible to take the advice on board. Mothers seem to be hardwired with some form of guilt always hanging around, and things they used to enjoy now feel selfish.
Your poor body has barely recovered from the last pregnancy and painful birth, and people are already querying when you’re going for the next round. This is a favourite for people to ask, without giving any thought to just how personal the question really is.
You will usually only hear this one from someone who has never had a child before or someone who has very little to do with helping out at home. The mere thought of comparing maternity leave and caring for an infant to anything resembling a holiday is laughable, as the distinct lack of umbrella cocktails and sandy beaches will prove.
Yes, just what you want to hear after spending nine months lugging this thing around and then the added time of getting them out. New babies usually don’t look much like anything except for a new baby, so try to keep comments about their appearance to yourself.
Thank you, Captain Obvious. The people who make remarks about how tired you look and don’t immediately follow it up with an offer to do some housework or watch the baby while you take a quick snooze should be swiftly shown to the front door.
The second new babies are born, people are trying to get them to sleep through the night like an adult. However, anyone who’s raised children before will know it can take years before they actually sleep through the night (with some lucky exceptions). Comments like this only add unwanted pressure when it’s just not needed.
These comments have good intent. However, the thought that you should be optimistically loving every second of motherhood is a joke. There are dirty nappies, weeks and months running on an hour of sleep at a time, and babies with reflux or a common cold who just can’t stop crying. It’s okay to not love every minute and it would be frankly weird if you did, so don’t set yourself up for something that’s just not realistic.
This is one of the worst pieces of advice for a stressed mother because the comment alone will cause more stress. While it might be true that babies can pick up on your emotions, according to a recent study, pointing this out to a tired and weary mother won’t do anything to improve her mood. Instead, make offers to help where you can and give them some time out to regain their cool.
By far the best thing you can do for a new mother is to keep your mouth shut and do everything possible to make their lives a little easier. Wash some dishes, fold a few baskets of laundry, or offer to take the baby while they get a rare hot shower in peace.For more advice on the joys of motherhood and how to make a more enjoyable experience for mum, click here to read the rest of the Peachymama blog.
Comments will be approved before showing up.
Here are some of the most frequently asked questions new mums have, that not everyone will necessarily tell you about..
Kids who typically turn their nose up at a piece of salmon will transform into fish lovers after they try this omega-3 brain boosting recipe!
|FRONT RISE||28||11||29||11 1/2||30||11 3/4||31||12|
|INSIDE LEG||76||30||77||30 1/3||78||30 2/3||79||31|
* 'Inside Leg' is the measurement that indicates the pant's length.
** The 'Front Rise' is the measurement from your crotch to your belly button.
The sizing & fit of Peachymama nursing clothes are specially designed for you and your ‘after baby’ body. This means that if you were say, an AU/UK ’S’ (8-10) before bubs came along, you’ll most likely be the same now in Peachymama sizing.
Wrap the measuring tape around the fullest part of your bust, waist and hips. When measuring your bust we recommend you wear your nursing bra.
Watch Taryn explain...
In the video, Taryn wears size 12/14 (AU Medium)
Questions? Contact Stacey(Monday to Friday 9am-5pm AEST.)